to a great extent

(an essay in progress for my upcoming issue #3 about girls rock camp)

i’ve heard dismissals of female bassists ever since i knew that punk existed. i used to play drums, partly because i love rhythm and percussion instruments and always have, but also partly because i wanted to be one of the ones to prove them wrong. prove that i could hack it on a ‘hard’ instrument, that i wasn’t just going to cop out and play something ‘easy’. but the tokenizing of female drummers that i saw was a double edged sword, in much the same way as it is for any other instrument.

one side of it, the one i saw most often, was of the “aww isn’t that cute/but she’s terrible” ilk. women who weren’t necessarily amazing at drums, but the sheer fact that they were doing it was enough to elicit scorn from some members of the largely male audience — towards the band for ‘purposely’ including a woman just for the hype, even though she wasn’t amazing; or towards the woman herself, for the simple crime of not being a fucking drum prodigy, and judgments of her attractiveness. nevermind the bazillion shitty-to-average dude drummers in local bands who were accepted without comment, or at least without sexism-energized comment.

the other side was the shock and surprise of all the dudes who were blown away by any woman who could actually shred at drums because holy shit that obviously NEVER happens (and in short order would move on to hot she was/how they wanted to marry and/or fuck her).

one of the rights of people in punk is to suck. to be a shitty ass musician but to still have the space to do it and to learn and grow together and to share music and to create shit. holding one specific group of musician (such as women-identified folks) to a higher standard and cruel judgments that ARE related to gender is pointless and stupid, but i heard it all too often, and held myself to it, too. it’s what kept me from following through on starting a band for so long. i knew i wasn’t going to be amazing when i started, and i knew how people were going to react by either tokenizing me or crushing me, or both.

i didn’t grow up with riot grrrl. i came of age in punk within a largely male group that mostly went to hardcore shows and felt most bonded with each other; i’ve talked about this before. it’s taken me a long time to work through all of this stuff and i still am. the difference now is that i have the benefit of hindsight, and also, that i’m in a band in which i play bass and sing.

which brings me to female bassists in particular. here are some common assumptions to be critical of:

1. that a female bassist in a band with men is there as a token member because she is female

2. that playing bass is inherently inferior/easier and that other instruments/skills are more valuable

3. that a female bassist is not a good musician OR is a special unicorn female who can actually play

guitarists are traditionally heralded as the drivers of bands, the songwriters, the ones who play the important stuff that people remember (aside from vocals). if a bassist is really fucking crazy good, then they get acknowledged, but largely, guitars and vocals are what we choose to emphasize when we look at punk, or think about where it’s coming from in the most basic sense. bass is often assumed to be easier, just a back up to the guitars, something to provide a sense of depth and rhythm in an often unassuming way. but you know what? bass is a badass fucking instrument. and lots of punk songs only include like, 3 guitar chords. so much for guitar automatically being more worthy of our respect…

when i taught bass and did counselor stuff at girls rock camp, i told the bass girls: you are NOT just there to back everyone else up. don’t ever forget that. you play a fun and interesting and varied instrument that you can do tons of different stuff with. without you, songs often sound hollow and empty. and there are tons of songs that are bass-driven, and there’s no reason why you can’t do that too. and then i taught them the bass line to longview by green day, haha.

i play bass because i have always been a rhythm person. i’ve tried guitar and i didn’t like it; i prefer the deeper callouses and knee-shaking levels of the bass. i don’t think that makes me less of a musician or less a part of my band. it’s true that when i started, i wasn’t very advanced. who is, really? i’ve grown a lot since i started. my bass lines get more and more complicated and faster and involve more. i learn quickly and meld some of my own ideas with others’. i understand more, and i get frustrated when something like my bass levels being practically non-existent in our 7” recording happens.

most of all, i know that my legitimacy as a musician does not hinge on what a bunch of snotty dudes think or what they personally value within my band when they focus on the talent of one particular member over others. i’ve been self conscious about perceptions of me as a token female bassist, and some people have treated me in various ways based on their assumption of this (a lot of people haven’t though, which rules). but i know i’m not a token. i know i am a key and that we all share equal roles in making our band what it is. i will never pretend that my womanhood plays no part in my role or experience, because it does. it plays a really important part and it informs who i am, where i come from and what fuels me. but i’m also someone who is just playing music with her friends and having fun and creating something, and at the end of the day we need to remember this about every musician and get rid of our dumb assumptions and standards to make creating music accessible to EVERYONE.